Saturday, March 25, 2017

It is the same reflection as yesterday

As far as exercise goes, I plan on either walking or at least do something else that is fun.  I have been inspired by Cize and Body Beast in the past.  I am tired of just being inspired.  I finally get to see myself in the mirror and I finally get to realize that not only do I need to lose weight and keep it off, but also to exercise to gain confidence.  I lack the consistency to exercise.  Now is the time to learn.

As for food goes, my plan is not just to lose weight, but to buy more food that isn't processed.  My diet I admit is not good.  I need to learn to say no.  I also need to learn to listen to my hunger cues. I have not been officially diagnosed as having binge eating disorder but I know that I have an issue not only with food but with consistency.

I have no idea what I need to plan for tomorrow, but I realize that consuming processed foods have been bad for me.  Of course, that is for everyone, but it is especially true for me.  I have a hormonal condition and I need to follow that particular diet if I need to lose weight and become fit.  I realize seriously that I do complain too much,

I am scared.  How do I overcome that fear of being fearful?  I guess the answer is to overcome anxiety.  I have made too many excuses and I finally see myself as someone who isn't just filled with flaws.  I am a living breathing human being that sees good days and bad days.  I also not only see flaws but I see an all-or-nothing thinking that I wish I could change overnight.  I believe in black-n-white morality where there is no shade of gray.  I also have translated it to how I live my day.  I would like to be able to change my way of thinking.

How I need to do that, I don't know.  Today is a gift since it is the present.  Tomorrow is another day. I can finally move forward.  Everyday is a step closer to reaching my goal, whatever that may be.  I do need support, but there are things that I can do myself.  I think it is time to be a grown up and do grown up things, for even tomorrow may be too late.