Today's musing is in black

I have struggled and struggled some more.  Well, I have written in the last two blogs I have written about action.  The reason why I struggle is because I have often failed to follow what I need to follow.  I am afraid to fail.  Now that I know the reason, how do I overcome that so that the pressure to lose weight and be healthy no longer becomes greater.  I was mentally overwhelmed for a number of reasons.  Deep down, I am also troubled by the lack of success I have made over the years.  This is in part during my struggle to not only make but also follow my plans.  I wonder how other people don't seem to follow those plans.  Should I just start over?  Should I just follow the plans laid out before me above.  I have the plans and the guidelines, so what am I waiting for?

I realize that whenever I say action, I mean to take action now, not later.  Anyways, I could really use some help in overcoming procrastinating.  I am taking too long to do something I am doing.  It pains me to say this.  However, I will say it, or rather write it out.    I have so many tools to use when it comes to what I have in order to lose weight.  For a while, I have put so much pressure on myself that I realize that I can let it go. I have begun to stress myself out on my food intake or exercise.  I am a diabetic who is also obese.  I have not changed that fact in years.  I do have a number of medical issues that it is as if some are easier than others to deal with.  Well, I have to see things differently or at least learn to.  The answers to not procrastinating is to make a schedule and to realize that health is not to be taken for granted.  This is my health.

How do I make small changes?  Today, I have realized how hard losing weight is.  I struggled.  I lost and gained.  I am just tired of struggling.  I wish I had the foresight that I had months ago.  I am learning how to appreciate my struggle.  Well, struggling is better than nothing.